Saturday, April 30, 2011

The One that (ALMOST) Got Away!


....i had one that ALMOST got away... but fate brought that one person back to me... :)

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The One That Got Away
Source: The Manila Times

In your life, you’ll make note of a lot of people. Ones with whom you shared something special, ones who will always mean something. There’s the one you first kissed, the one you first loved, the one you lost your virginity to, the one you put on a pedestal, the one you’re with…and the one that got away.

Who is the one that got away? I guess it’s that person with who everything was great, everything was perfect, but the timing was just wrong. There was no fault in the person, there was no flaw in the chemistry, but the cards just didn’t fall the right way, I suppose.

I believe in the fact that ending up with someone, finding a long time partner that is, does not lie merely in the other person. I can actually argue that an equal part, or maybe even the greater part, has to do with the matter of timing. It has to do with you being ready to settle down and commit to someone in a way that goes beyond the little niceties of
giddy romance.

How often have you gone through it without even realizing it? When you’re not ready to commit in that mature manner, it doesn’t matter who you’re with, it just doesn’t work. Small problems become big; inconsequentials become dealbreakers simply because you’re not ready and it shows. It’s not that you and the person you’re with are no good; it’s just that it’s not yet right, and little things become the flashpoint of that fact.

Then one day you’re ready. You really are. And when this happens you’ll be ready to settle down with someone. He or she may not be the most perfect, they might not be the brightest star of romance to ever have burned in your life, but it’ll work because you’re ready. It’ll work because it’s the right time and you’ll make it work. And it’ll make sense, it really will.

So that day comes when you’re finally making sense of things, and you find yourself to be a different person. Things are different, your approach is different, you finally understand who you are and what you want, and you’ve become ready because the time has truly arrived. And mind you, there’s no telling when this day will come. Hopefully you’re single but you could be in a long-term relationship, you could be married with three kids, it doesn’t matter. All you know is that you’ve changed, and for some reason, the one that got away, is the first person you think about.

You’ll think about them because you’ll wonder, "What if they were here today?" You’ll wonder, "What if we were together now, with me as I am and not as I was?" That’s what the one that got away is. The biggest"What if?" you’ll have in your life.

If you’re married, you’ll just have to accept the fact that the one that got away, got away. Believe me, no matter how fairy tale you think your marriage is, this can happen to the best of us. But hopefully you’re mature enough to realize that you’re already with the one you’re with and this is just another test of your commitment, one which will juststrengthen your marriage when you get past it. Sure, you’ll think about him/her every so often, but it’s alright. It’s never nice to live
with a "might have been," but it happens.

Maybe the one that got away is the one who’s already married. In which case it’s the same thing. You just have to accept and know that your memories of that person will probably bring a nice little smile to your lips in the future when you’re old and gray and reminiscing.

But if neither of that is the case, then it’s different. What do you do if it’s not yet too late? Simple…find him, find her. Because the very existence of a "one that got away" means that you’ll always wonder, what if you got that one?

Ask him out to coffee, ask her out to a movie, it doesn’t matter if you’ve dropped in from out of nowhere. You’d be surprised, you just might be "the one that got away" as well for the person who is your "the one that got away."

You might drop in from out of nowhere and it won’t make a difference. If the timing is finally right, it’ll all just fall into place somehow and you know, I’m thinking, it would be a great feeling, in the end, to be able to say to someone, "Hey you, you’re the one that almost got away."

CHANCE or CHOICE?

I was clearing off my Friendster account and came across blog postings I have uploaded in 2006... fast-forward to 5 years later and this posting has a whole new meaning to it but has given me the same butterflies-in-my-stomach feeling.... *sigh*

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When we meet the right person to love, at the right place, at the right time…that’s chance.

When you meet someone you’re attracted to, that’s not a choice…that’s chance.
Being caught up in a moment (and there’s a lot of couples who get together because of this) is not a choice, that’s also chance.
The difference is, what happens afterwards? When will you take that infatuation, that crush, that mind-blowing attraction to the next level?
That’s when all sanity goes back, you sit down and then contemplate whether you want to make this into a concrete relationship or just a fling. If you decide to love a person , even with his faults, that’s not chance…that’s choice.
When you choose to be with a person no matter what, that’s choice.
Even if you know that there are many people out there who are more attractive, smarter and richer than your mate, and yet, you decide to love your mate just the same, that’s choice.
Infatuation, crushes, attractions come to us by chance. But true love that last are choices made. Regarding soulmates, there’s a beautiful movie
qoute that i believe is so true about this–

"I do believe that soulmates do exist. That there is truly someone mad
e for you. But it’s still up to you to make the choice if you’re going to do something about it or not. We may meet people by chance, but loving and staying with them is still a choice we have to make. And by making that choice we have to make sure that no matter what we’re not going to regret it in time……"